The stop sign just up the street from our house does more than control vehicle traffic. It controls a little piece of my kids’ lives. A stop sign should add an element of predictability to the cars passing by. It should slow them down. It should make drivers more aware of pedestrians and the kids who swarm the neighborhood. It doesn’t. If anything it makes traffic less predictable. If we lived on a straight stretch of neighborhood road, with no impediment to travel at all, you could count on fewer variables. In fact, it would be quite simple. Cars would [...]
autism
Interpreting Beth
Many of you know Beth has high functioning autism. Some of you know Beth. A few of you are familiar with Beth’s low tolerance for discomfort of any kind, and the hypochondria that accompanies it.More than once we’ve played the town’s folk as Beth cried wolf, only to find later the wolf was real – and caught up to her. When she was a newborn/toddler her way too frequent complaints turned out to be urinary tract infections brought about my a birth defect requiring surgery – and removal of half a kidney. As she got older, the constant stomach pains [...]
Summer’s end
Beth starts school on Monday, and you know what’s crazy – besides the fact that we’re only half way through August and school’s already starting – I didn’t know. That’s right, I’m such a lousy father I didn’t know when school started. Well, today I’m feeling charitable. I like to think I’m just forgetful. Forgetful parents aren’t necessarily lousy, are they? Anyhoo, I’m of a mind to see this as a great step forward for Beth. Not that her father didn’t know, but that I wasn’t worrying about it coming. Dreading is actually a better word. You see, when most [...]
When the autism spectrum wins
After a month of hunting down posts about Beth’s childhood, my mind wandered to our other child. How has he fared through all of this? I remember first thinking in terms of Beth’s disorder “winning” during a Skype therapy session for obsessive-compulsive disorder. The therapist sought to personalize, yet disassociate the disorder from Beth in a way. She tried to objectify it – make it seem separate and distinct, to make it into something for Beth to fight. It also served to lift some of the shame from her shoulders. “This isn’t you Beth. This is OCD, and we can [...]
