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Please don’t feed the ego

Who among you knew that I was a great husband? Lest you doubt me, I have proof. Today I was in the maternity store in the mall buying nursing bras for my wife. If that were not proof enough, listen to this,

I had several intelligent questions for the clerk regarding size and style, and I knew the correct responses regarding nursing pads (not disposable, white, no lace). It was a small shop and there were several women in attendance. After my interaction with the clerk was complete, the women in the store all stopped what they were doing and broke out into spontaneous applause. Several commented that I must be a wonderful husband.

“Why?” I asked this random sample of womanhood.

“Because I couldn’t get my husband in here if a model stripped naked on the counter and shouted ‘come hither.'”

** Full disclosure: I made up the bit about the applause.

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I'm sorry but I can't sum me up in this limited amount of space. No, I take that back. I'm not sorry.