I have made it perfectly clear that I hate Saturn. I have no problems with any of the planets in our solar system, but I do have problems with a particular american auto maker. My dislike is easier to live with now that I am no longer burdened with the lemon formerly parked in my driveway. However, because of this dislike I am happy to share this drive time story with you today.

I was driving down the highway on my way home from work. Like all good defensive drivers, I was paying attention to the cars around me. I noticed another victim of Saturn ahead and to the right of me. At first there was nothing obvious about the car to suggest that the driver was a victim, not yet anyway. In fact, the car looked pretty good (for a Saturn). You know what they say about looks… they can be deceiving. Much to my surprise (I’m sure the driver was surprised too), the front driver side fender started flapping like a flag in a forty mile an hour gale. The front corner would drop to the ground and bounce up, due to the forward movement of the piece of cr… I mean car. Traffic was moving at brisk forty miles an hour, thus producing the flapping like movement. I don’t know much about cars, but I don’t think body parts are supposed to swing free like a guy in boxer shorts.

Other than the bouncing action off of the pavement, it looked like a perfectly good front fender. Of course, the fender might not have been Saturn’s fault. Maybe the guy needed a few screws to hang things on the wall at home and decided to take them out of his car. Maybe there’s an epidemic of fender loosening pranksters running rampant on the Florida highways. Maybe he was in a minor fender-bender and decided to save a few bucks by installing his own replacement fender. Then again, maybe he just bought the wrong kind of car.

Regardless of the real reason, you know my vote.