Wellbeing

Finding salvation in a little plastic bottle

It would be so easy. My eyes want it so much. I could just let them close for a moment. Oh yeah, that’s it. Just for a few minutes. It feels so right to let them close. Every limb feels so heavy. Every movement seems to take three times the effort as normal.

Can’t I just sit here and rest for a moment? Maybe doze off for a few moments? Even sitting up in a desk chair, sitting motionless with my eyes closed, feels like heavenly bliss.

LOAF: v. to pass time at leisure; idle.

Loafing. Employees shall remain productive while performing their assigned duties or tasks during work hours, and shall not be idle, waste time, engage in idle talk or gossip. (from my employer’s personnel disciplinary standards and procedures manual)

It may be time for chemical intervention.

“Will that be a Mountain Dew or a caffeine supplement?”

Drastic times call for drastic measures. It may be time to bring out the big gun: Walgreens “Stay Awake”, 200mg caffeine supplement.

“Doesn’t supplement usually refer to something that your body needs? Your body doesn’t really need caffeine, does it?” Umm, it does right now.

I’d like to take this opportunity to thank Walgreens for producing a cheap, fast acting source of caffeine; and my boss, for having the wisdom to make Friday his weekly day off.

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I'm sorry but I can't sum me up in this limited amount of space. No, I take that back. I'm not sorry.