There’s been good news and bad news this week, but I’ll start with the good. The tree scare is finally coming to an end. To date we’ve talked to five tree guys, four experts, and too many friends to count. Opinions have ranged from “cut it down,” to thirteen thousand dollars of pins, cables, fertilizers, and injected fungi, to trimming it up a bit. Depending on the person, we’ve been told our tree is two different species, with two very different lifespans.

This week we finally got an opinion from an expert (a certified arborist) which seconded a previous opinion, so we’re finally ready to proceed with a plan… a plan which thankfully doesn’t involve cutting it down or spending our computer budget.

The bad news it that my mother’s apparent recovery two weeks ago was just what it appeared to be: too good to be true. That day was the only good day she’s had. This week she’s been back in the medical hospital due to severe dehydration, which brings up concerns about the care she’s received at the psychiatric facility. Yesterday and last night we played the insurance game again… due to her psychiatric benefits long ago being used up, insurance not wanting to pay for anything which might have anything to do with her mental problems, the medical hospital wanting to shed a patient that might not be able to pay, and a psychiatric facility that doesn’t want a patient with medical problems they aren’t set up to treat. On top of that, it seems it’s only a matter of time before the county psychiatric facility decides to set a hearing (under the Baker Act) to have her committed long term, possibly to the state hospital… which is a nightmare beyond description.

If you’ll excuse me for a moment, I’d like to vent (cover the kids eyes).

I’M SO FUCKING FED UP WITH ALL OF IT. No, that doesn’t quite cover it. I’M SO SICK OF BEING FUCKING FED UP. My mother is being shuttled around like an unwanted vagrant, my father’s on the verge of another heart attack, and I’m more inept than the stupid tree I’ve been so worried about.

I’m not asking you, because I know you don’t know the answer… but I’d like to ask someone. When is it going to end? Doctors, psychiatrists, and nurses are seemingly incapable of speaking in anything but useless platitudes; and God doesn’t seem to be taking my calls lately.


  1. JK:
    I won’t bother with platitudes or words of faith that will have little meaning for you right now. All I can say is that it’s wrong that the world’s richest country can’t find a way to provide health care for everyone who needs it. That you, your father, your mother, your family… that all of you are suffering because your politicians have failed to create a kinder, gentler nation simply infuriates me.

    I’m glad that you’re posting, so more people will know of the injustice. And I hope that you’ll write more about your experiences. It will help others know that they are not alone, and it might help you sift through all the emotions you are feeling.

  2. I am very saddened by your 2nd to the last paragraph. Its a heart breaker. These are the times that try mens souls. Not wanting to compound yet another platitude, but it is true. I know you wish you could make it all go away and go back to normal again, and you feel helpless because you can’t fix it. Please trust in God and ask Him to help you get through this. Make sure to let your Mother know how dear she is to you and how happy you are that she is your Mother. That will do more for her than what the doctors can do. Don’t forget your Dad, let him know also. Tell him to be tough because you need him too.

    Mothers want to know they are loved and Fathers want to know they are needed. It is the key to their happiness and right now that is your priority.

    I wish you well and will pray for you and your family. Have faith.

Give the gift of words.