• Cold snap

    Colds, illness and allergies are running rampant through the Kauffman Household (v 2.2.1). There’s a flip side to a saying… “Anything that doesn’t make you stronger will only kill you.”

    Ah, now that’s a relief.

    Oh, this is also the time of year when all of the optimism of spring training… is shattered by terrible D-Rays pitching. With a couple of exceptions, it’s been kind of bad. How often does your offense score 7 runs, most of them really early, and you still lose by six runs? Man, I really-really wanted McClung to do well last night.

    Ah well. Looks like the Sox are doing well, at least. Man, I NEED re-alignment! I heard an interesting idea… that divisions were divided up by team payroll… the top five AL payrolls in one division… and so on. Yet another idea that will never happen.

  • Finding your depth

    Do you have an actor, in your repertoire of actors, that puts you off on their first appearance in a trailer? (Bonus points if you can guess whether I spelled that French word right on the first try!)

    Take that sentence, take it back 50 years, and I’ll bet you no one knows what the hell I’m talking about. For the full effect, you’ve got to read the following sentence in a southern-hick accent. “What-in-the-hell’s that boy doin’ with an actor in his trailer?”

    Furthermore, what’s a suburban warrior like myself doing with a “repertoire” of them? Am I having delusions of grandeur? Do I imagine that I can call one up to hang out? No, nothing like that… but… if you rely on your TV for entertainment I think your entitled to take a little ownership, even if it’s for no other reason than making yourself look smart by using a lot of high falutin’ French words.

    But I digress…

    A year or so ago I saw a preview for a movie called “Proof.” It had that guy from Donnie Darko, and Hannibal Lecter in it… so far so good. And oh… Gwyneth Paltrow. “I guess I don’t have to see that one right away.” (I didn’t spell her name right on the first try either. So if your guess was “no” above, you’re a winner. Don’t you feel better now, knowing that you’re a winner? I’m glad I could help.)

    But you know what? I can’t remember the last time I saw a Gwyneth Paltrow movie and walked out disappointed. Go ahead and paint me puce, I’m an ‘ole softy after all. Granted, it could be a function of initial expectation vs. final output, but I’m not so sure in this case. That was just a freakishly good movie. And it’s not like Donnie and Hannibal carried the flick either. Gwyneth was solid. So the question remains; why do I have it in for Gwyneth? Do I have it in for her just because she named her kid after a fruit? If you think that’s a little odd, get this: when I googled “Gweneth Paltro apple” it immediately said, “did you mean ‘Gwyneth Paltrow Apple?’ ” Who would have thought I was such a bad speller (besides every teacher of the mother tongue I’ve ever had)? Not quite as strange… the first few articles returned by my intrepid Google search announced “Gwyneth Paltrow has given birth to her first child, a daughter called Apple.” Ho there big fella! Who talks about someone having a child “called” something? Is this another crazy British thing, trying to wrest control over the language? If a kid’s just been born, it hasn’t been called much of anything yet. Usually when Cheryl “calls” me something, it sure as hell isn’t my given name. Ah, but I digress yet again. To the point my boy, to the point!

    If you like drama that doesn’t rely on soundtrack, catch lines, and overall Hollywood “over-production,” Proof is a pretty good pick.

  • Being a piss-poor loser

    Maybe I’ve just seen too many roughing the passer calls in football, but I think an intentional elbow to the head ought to be more than a minor penalty. So… too many men on the ice, intentional cheap shot to someone’s head… practically the same thing, right?

    By the way, it’s 6 – 1 now.

    Yeah, the TV’s still on. Whada you gonna do about it?