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That sucking sound you hear is my patience being drawn out through my eyeballs
Have you ever had one of those mornings where you knew deep down that you still loved your child, but boarding school seemed like an attractive option?
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It’s all about the choice
It was a perfectly splendid evening. Had it stayed that way, chances are good you’d be surfing the web’s wave to greener pastures right now. We were just finishing a thoroughly enjoyable episode of The Daily Show (courtesy of the tres cool DVR), when Cheryl offered her Hobson’s Choice of household drudgery. “So, do you want to start the dishwasher or take care of the laundry?” Loosely translated into King’s English, this means: “Carry thy arse to the galley and scrub down the finery, then meet me in our chambers to stow the remainder of the laundry.”
And this right before bedtime? How am I supposed to sleep now? Damn that wife of mine!
– Author’s note: while King’s English it may not be… I’d settle for mildly amusing to thee.
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The great cough-drop debate
In my book it is written: “no menthol-less cough drop shall come before me.” Come on, it’s the menthol that makes it go, I dare you to say it isn’t so!
I was sitting in my office, my throat in perfect operating condition, when I decided I wanted some menthol. Release the Halls! Nay, instead I got a poor, sugared up substitute. I got a luden’s. Don’t get me wrong, it tasted swell; but I don’t think it would have done a thing for my cough, if I had one. It tasted like, well, rather like a piece of candy. Is sugar a home remedy for the common cough? (Why yes, it is, but don’t stop me now.) Then I happened to notice the manufacturer, the Hershey Foods Corporation. That’s right; it’s THAT Hershey. That wacky Pennsylvania chocolatier thinks he’s got the drop on your cough!
Now take Halls; a serious drop for serious people, made by Cadbury, of cr’me egg fame? Is this a conspiracy? Are the sugar barons taking over the world? When will this madness end?
Methinks when I stop typing.