• Taking a pee in the stream of consciousness

    It starts with 1066. You may not know this, but 1066 represents the average monthly income of someone who works full time and earns the minimum wage – as defined by the newly amended Florida Constitution. What you may not know is that 1066 also represents the year of the Norman conquest of England, the last time England was conquered by a foreign army – consummated at the Battle of Hastings. What you are darn near certain not to know is that I confused the Battle of Hastings with the Battle of Tours early this morning. Charles earned his name “the hammer” when he ruthlessly smote the Moors at Tours in 732. Though I’m not sure they were Moors, they were definitely Muslims; and since Muslims don’t rhyme with Tours, you can see the allure of Moors.

    All of this led me to muse on monikers. Charles Martel had a kickin’ name. “The Hammer” makes all of those “greats” look like prissy little boys still trying to please their mammas. Anyone with a little pretension can consider themselves “great,” but “The Hammer” begs a little backup.

    Of course 1066 has nothing to do with “the hammer”, other than me and the stream, but it all has to start somewhere.

  • Paralyzed with indecision

    We’ve done the theme park thing twice now, in the last two weeks. On both occasions I eschewed my digital still camera in favor of my digital video camera. I felt I was duty bound to find some value in this new toy I’ve wanted for so long. The thing is; I couldn’t seem to shoot a scene without noting silently to myself that I was passing up a good shot with the still camera. I could have captured still images from the video, but only if I sacrificed quality.

    Somehow there must be a way to strike a balance. Surely there are some scenes where motion is more important than others. And yet, sometimes even motion is captured better with a still camera. An artfully composed shot can tell a viewer a lot, by allowing him or her to see more detail – without needing to keep up with the changing frames. I’m not one who’s prone to getting that artfully composed shot, but trying to get it is what makes still cameras fun. When I’m using the video camera, I can’t help but feel that I’m cheating in some way, by taking the easy way out.

    I must be having a pretty freakin’ good day if this is my biggest problem.

    You know what? I am.

  • Playing the broken record

    On Sunday we went to Sea World for a little family fun time. If you like it when circumstances tempt all of your shortcomings as a parent and a husband, then you would have had a great time. Adam’s nose started to run. Then Adam’s temper started to run. Then Beth’s mouth started to run. Then my patience started to run. Then everyone should have run.

    I can’t put my finger on the precise moment when Orlando became Bataan, but if the day had lasted much longer then Adam might have been up for a field promotion.

    Fortune smiled on me though, after staying up all night Sunday night/Monday morning with a sick kid, I was too dim-witted to be short with anyone yesterday (Monday proper). I’ve said it before, there’s a threshold I pass through where fatigue transitions from irritant to mild hypnotic. I could get four or five hours of sleep, add that to a trying day at an Orlando theme park, and be really cranky; or, I could anesthetize myself with no sleep and try again with the whole sleep thing when conditions are more favorable. Yeah man, Monday was a wild trip. I’d tell you if it went better than Sunday in Orlando, but I don’t remember much of Monday.

    Today? Still pretty much useless. We’ll see about sleep tonight.

    Oh, all right, I confess that Sunday wasn’t all that bad. Everyone was in pretty good spirits until around 3 p.m. We had an awesome drive over – snacks provided by my favorite caffeine vendor. We had a superlative lunch at the Shark Encounter Bistro (or whatever it’s really called). And I had a great time filming the highlights on my relatively new digital camcorder. Truth be told, I’d probably do it over again.

    Maybe someone should check my temperature?