What’s wet with this picture?

As you may know, I’m in the hospital. The chemo is done and modern medicine is doing its best to rescue me from cancer’s cure. Therein lies the rub… or more appropriately, the tub. In order to flush out my kidneys I’m on a near constant IV drip of fluids. Further, I’m on a regular diet; strongly encouraged to suck up as much of the wet stuff as I can.

Unfortunately, I am not a man of science fiction. I have no mystical reigns on the laws of physics; able to steer them at my will. Therefore, the capacity of my body to retain fluids is finite. You could hook up an IV directly to my bladder and inflate it like a water balloon… but without constant relief, it’s going to burst forth with a flow that one day will be remembered in song.

This is why I must pay hourly* homage to mankind’s unheralded achievement: indoor plumbing.

*Give or take 50 minutes.

Give the gift of words.