• Bring it… oh never mind

    Dude! I totally forgot to publish this entry! (Here it is, as originally conceived and typed in the A.M. of 5/26)

    The news this morning reports that 43 regrets using phrases like “bring it on,” when addressing the insurgents in Iraq (albeit indirectly, via news conference). Apparently the leader of the free world believes he was misinterpreted. I can see how someone might misinterpret “bring it on.” It all depends on your definition of “it.” For the insurgents, “it” was obviously a whole lot of disruptive violence. Who woulda thunk it?

    Come on Georgie. This wasn’t the key note speech for the Betty Crocker Cook-Off. “Bring it on” wasn’t a challenge to whip up the best bowl of chili this side of Crawford. When you’re addressing a bunch of angry guys with guns, there’s only one thing they’re likely to bring… and it ain’t a cup of sugar. Heck, coming from Texas I’d think you already knew that.

    Anyway, I guess there’s never a bad time that to learn that cowboys make nice movie heroes but terrible diplomats.

  • I can’t believe it’s not Wednesday!

    So you say its Thursday. I guess I’m in no position to argue. Hosting a (likely) viral infection automatically disqualifies me as official timekeeper. Heck, it could be Sunday for all I know. Here’s what I do know, and this is probably the most important thing of all… I’m sitting at home with my feet at the same elevation as my waist. What’s even more important (considering I have a head cold): my head is still higher than my waist. Trust me, the last think you need is more fluid rushing to your head when you’ve got sinus issues.

    All of this was made possible by our second hand (but still in the family), Lazy-Boy recliner. Growing up I never pictured myself as a “Lazy-Boy” guy. To me, the arch-type of the “Lazy-Boy” guy is Archie Bunker… and I just don’t have that kind of presence. I’ll tell you what though, you come in out of the heat, into the air conditioning, plunk yourself down, and give a pull on that magic lever… you hit the jackpot every time. EVERY time baby!

  • The worst teaser ever

    You would never read the ending of a book first, because it spoils the rest of the book knowing what happens. Now imagine you just read the first book in a series and there was a teaser chapter at the end for the second book. This book had such a chapter, and it was o.k., so I went ahead and bought the second book. I got about a third of the way through the second book and there was no sign of the sample from the first book. In fact, it hadn’t even built up to the sample, and I was feeling really, really cheated. It was a real struggle to get even that far, considering it was all “back story,” and not particularly interesting “back story” at that. On a hunch I checked the end of the book. Sure enough, the sample chapter for the second book was THE LAST STINKING CHAPTER OF THE SECOND BOOK!

    What knuckle head thought that one up? I might as well have saved my five bucks and skipped right to the third book in the series. After this fiasco I’m not sure I want to buy any more of this guy’s books.

    And did I mention the book was bad? Parts of the book read like they were cribbed from L. Ron Hubbard. The series went from a decent sci-fi tale to a wacky, pseudo-religious manifesto in a couple hundred pages.

    Yep, that’s about it. I’m done.