• Who feels my pain?

    There are certain things where you should be able to count on spouse. For example, when you are asking your wife if there’s anything she needs done, and you are clearly just asking to be polite (having no real desire, intention, or energy for chores), shouldn’t a caring and thoughtful wife immediately sense this and act accordingly?

    Love isn’t honeymoons, Valentines Day cards, or anniversaries, it’s taking the trash out on Sunday evening when you feel like the last thing you found in your son’s diaper.

    Now if I could just convince Cheryl,

  • The ignoramus strikes again (that’s me)

    Does the incidence of “High Fructose Corn Syrup” in our diet have anything to do with Ethanol subsidies, or have I just watched one too many episodes of the West Wing?

    Your Department of Energy:
    “Using your money to keep America’s teeth sweet on the cheap.”

  • The Xbox cometh

    We’ve been an Xbox house for less than 24 hours, and already my thumbs hurt. I am convinced that a whole generation of children is growing up with unprecedented thumb and forefinger agility – and with good reason. That thing could be as addictive as Pringles,. I plugged it in last night and lost two hours of my life. Just, gone. The next thing I know, Cheryl’s giving me a swat to the head.

    “John, are you planning to sleep tonight?”
    “Um, yeah.”
    “John, did you hear what I said?”
    “Um, yeah.”
    “John, could you do some yard work this weekend?”
    “WHAT?!? WHERE AM I?!? WHAT’S HAPPENING?!?”

    “Yeah, my Jimmy isn’t much of a reader, but he’s a wicked good shot in Splinter Cell!” It’s too bad there’s no way to take advantage of all this training later in life. The minute we can perform labor inexpensively via remote hand controller, this nation will have the best damn work force, period.

    Look out Far East, here comes the Play Station Generation.