• Friends, Floridians, fellow storm trackers, lend me your ears

    There are a bevy of storm products out there to make your hurricane experience more enjoyable, and there’s nothing like two close calls in the span of three weeks to put a little slack in those purse strings and loosen the crease in those wallets! Yesterday, your roaming blog correspondent walked into a 3M storm-window shop (it happened to be right next door to my daughter’s pediatrician, where my wife was taking care of some home healthcare business). It turns out that protecting your windows from flying debris is just as expensive as I thought it was. Starting at about eight dollars per square foot of protection, you can have easy to install metal shutters. Ringing in at about nine dollars per square foot of protection, you can have state of the art, 3M film, sealed to your existing windows. “For A LOT more money” (as the 3M representative put it) you can have roll-away shutters. Anywhere from a few hundred dollars to a few thousand dollars, you can get a gasoline powered generator for those electric appliances you just can’t live without (provided you’ve hoarded enough gasoline).

    Cha-ching Batman, that’s some serious coin! Storm preparedness is the new growth industry in Florida. I was walking out of the store to meet up with Cheryl, who had finished up her business with the doctor’s office, when I spotted a car in the lot just outside the 3M shop. The bumper sticker said “I (red heart) Capitalism.”

    **Author’s note: the car with the bumper sticker is a product of my imagination.

  • Looking for an old friend

    I return to work after a four day layoff something less than refreshed. There are now two storms down, with one possibly to go. A slight relaxation deficit, combined with a computer system failure, conspires to make this a very long morning. It’s a classic story, really. Who among you haven’t sat idly at work while everything around you refused to cooperate? Who hasn’t wished they could really boot their computer (out the window)? And when that didn’t suffice, who among you hasn’t been more than ready to re-boot it (repeatedly)?

    Here’s some news that just came in over the (phone) wire, a seven year old girl in Dunedin has just regurgitated copious amounts of previously consumed foodstuff. Eyewitnesses on the scene report that the girl was not feeling well prior to breakfast, and that the events to follow were not entirely unexpected.

    Today is just one more day in the life of a typical suburban warrior, facing the challenges of fatigue and boredom head on – with the help of America’s favorite stimulant. When am I finally going to get off this caffeine kick ‘o mine? I figure in about six hours. The real question is: what will I do then?

  • We now return you to our regularly scheduled weather pattern

    Our last reminders of Hurricane/Tropical Storm Frances are sitting in a large pile at the end of our driveway. After one false start, I was awarded an extra day off from work to deal with these reminders which were previously scattered about our yard. Spending half of the morning reminiscing in the yard was a really great time. Armed with a rake, a pair of gloves, two trashcans and one daughter eager to help – who wouldn’t have a good time?

    Anyway, after about two hours I was ready to do some serious forgetting in the comfort of my air-conditioned family room. On my way inside, my wife came out to greet me at the front step. What do you suppose she said to me?

    “John, you did an absolutely fabulous job on the front yard. It looks better now than it did before the storm.” You didn’t let a stranger mix your drink, did you?

    “John, I’m so glad I have a man like you around.” Laugh and you’re cruising for a bruising.

    “John, you deserve a break today, at McDonalds!” Ah, no.

    “What about the back yard?” We have a winner!