• If no one sees a new bicycle in the showroom, does it cost any money?

    I have been the satisfied owner of a neon yellow, aluminum frame, Trek bicycle since January 1991. I have gone in and out of bicycle shops through the years, but I’ve restricted my browsing to items of need rather than desire. In this way, I have substantially eluded the phenomenon known as “Post-shopping stress disorder”, or P.S.S.D. (pronounced “pissed”). References to P.S.S.D. can often be seen in popular American slang. Common phrases like: “I came back from shopping today really P.S.S.D.”; or, “I saw this really cool pair of pants on sale at the mall today and nearly P.S.S.D. myself” are but a few examples.

    Well you guessed it; I went to the bike shop on Saturday and P.S.S.D myself over a new bike.

    Coughing up a cool thousand on a new purchase hasn’t looked so good in nearly seventy-two hours (when separation anxiety set in over my hospitalized iBook).

    George? Tom? Abe? Alex? Andy? U.S.? Ben? Why have you all forsaken me?

  • It’s not easy being responsible

    “This is going to hurt me more than it’s going to hurt you.” If you’ve been following my recent adventures, you know that I was talking to my poor iBook, just before I left it at the shop for repairs.

    I feel guilty. I feel lonely. Most importantly, I feel bored. My five year old, Bondi Blue, original iMac hasn’t seen this much action since, well, I bought a new iBook almost three years ago. I haven’t sat at a desk this much since, well, I went to work on Thursday.

    Boo desk!

    Yeah bed!

    Boy am I tired.

  • Mother nature reeks havoc with my hammies

    Riding a bicycle to work during the rainy season in Florida is like rolling the dice and betting on a number between one and twelve. Here’s my summer forecast: there’s a 100% chance that I’m going to get awfully wet. There are two ways to accomplish this feat of aquatic proportions. One, engage your body’s temperature regulation system; or two, ride home in an afternoon thunderstorm. The first method can result in chronic perspiration, dehydration, and a really bad smell. The second, and less recommended method, can result in an elevated heart rate, severe anxiety, an increased risk for bodily injury, and a swift kick in the keester from your spouse.