• My keys to a good cup of yogurt

    1. Always choose fruit flavoring that is dark in color and full in flavor – preferably sweet, not bitter.
    2. Don’t give the “live and active cultures” any extra time to culture.
    3. Cold is good, warm is a trip to the ER.
    4. Yogurt and fried foods don’t mix.
    5. Pick an appropriate beverage to wash it down; preferably something not overly sweet. And for heaven’s sake, put that orange juice away before you hurt someone!
    6. Vanilla yogurt = plain yogurt = turn around and run the other way.
    7. Don’t take expiration dates for granted; just because it’s on the grocery store shelf doesn’t mean it’s still good. You wouldn’t normally trust your life to a complete stranger, so don’t trust it to a store clerk who only works there because of the easy access to the beer in the back storeroom.

  • Tides of emotion

    Dear Lord,

    Please give me the strength to watch just one more hockey game this season. Give me the courage to sit through the whole game. Give the players the endurance to put forth their best effort.

    And if you know of any good over-the-counter meds for severe anxiety, heartburn, and nausea, that wouldn’t hurt either.

    Amen.

  • More useless information

    About fifteen minutes ago the sax music got more cheerful. About ten minutes ago it became apparent that the sax man was no longer alone. I peered out my third floor window and I saw something that was only slightly less unlikely than a man panhandling: two people from another department getting married. It turns out the basket was for wedding gifts, not donations for the sax man.

    Riding into work this morning I was fairly expectation free, but I’ll admit that I was a little surprised by a lunch hour wedding.