• D-day, H-hour is 10 a.m. tomorrow.

    The wait ends tomorrow. After an extremely long week, we find out if the dream of another child is still alive or put on hold once again. Meanwhile, Cheryl is still showing symptoms of pregnancy, which is either a good sign of things to come or a cruel joke.

  • Tick tock.

    Stare a the keyboard. Stare at the playful kids. Glance at the magazine headlines. Think about writing. Admire the reflection of the lights on the windows. Wonder where they got their wallpaper. Feel the texture of the carpet under your foot. Wiggle your toes to get that irritating piece of sock out from between them. Look around casually for a good time to pull your pants from between your cheeks. Guess the ratio of face lifts to natural faces in the lobby (1/11). Make eye contact with a random stranger across the room and promise yourself you won’t be the first to look away. Loose at your own game. Go for less of a challenge and pick someone older than five. Think about sitting outside. Listen in on the nattering of a random nice person. Wonder who that person really is; what are their fears, their desires? Wonder if this entry could be confused with an acid trip.

  • Yesterday’s luxuries are today’s necessities.

    Several years ago I got a free Palm OS handheld device. I wasn’t sure how much I would use one, but free is free. It turns out I used it a lot, so much so that now find that I can’t do without it. Today I found out what it was like to do without when mine broke. It turns out the little guys don’t react well to extremely sudden deceleration. Take an object and accelerate it at about 9.8 meters/second (squared). Let it accelerate for about one meter. Now stop it suddenly – applying the force necessary to stop it on a dime (so to speak). You’ll likely find (as I did) that a Palm OS handheld device won’t quite be the same after such an exercise. This evening I found myself parting with more of my hard earned money. I’d be upset but my brand spankin’ new Palm OS handheld device is tres chic. (Yeah, yeah – the frenchies rubbed off on me a little.)

    Hey Beth, could you do me a favor? Could you take my laptop and drop it on the kitchen floor for me?