• Crunch.

    Have you ever noticed the sound that two cars make when they come together in an unconventional manner? Have you heard the sound that a driver makes when her new car gets together with another in an unconventional manner?

    Have you ever taken a turn and had the back end of your car move out from underneath you unexpectedly? Have you done this after it just starts raining? After regaining control of your car and after somehow avoiding the other lanes of traffic, have you had someone plow into your now stationary car from behind you, from your own lane? Have you ever sprinted through the parking lot at your place of employment, rushing off to survey the damage to your wife and property for yourself?

    Most importantly, do you know what it’s like to walk away from an auto accident without any injuries? Thankfully, we can answer yes to ALL of these questions.

  • What was that again?

    How much would you expect to pay for the “Orange Rubber Watch, Large”? If you are interested in large, orange, rubber watches, you may be interested to know that you can get one for $595 (not including the appropriate taxes and shipping fees) from NeimanMarcus.com.

    If only I had known large, orange, rubber watches were going to be such a big thing! Damn! Another opportunity for the big time passes me by.

  • One man can make a difference.

    The Bucs made a big mistake. No, I’m not talking about the KJ affair. No, I’m not referring to the decision to play it safe in the last three minutes against the Colts. And no, I’m not talking about any of the decisions regarding special teams this year (although maybe I should). Instead, I’m talking about a guy named McKay. You know, the guy that now works for Atlanta?

    There are several reasons why the Bucs have been a pretty consistent performer on the field for the last six or seven years. They have had some good players, they have had some good coaches, and they have made good personnel decisions. They’ve kept payroll under control, and they’ve avoided some of the “sign-em now, pay for it later” salary cap disasters that have beset other teams. Now who do you suppose has been there making these decisions? I’ll give you a hint: his name is not Jon (although he did have a father named John). Now there’s talk that the current coach might like to have the GM he had with his former team; that they would make a good team again. Now ask yourself, which team in the league is currently most likely to implode from salary cap disaster? Look no further than coach’s former team.

    Now try and tell me that McKay leaving for a division rival is a good thing.