We have successfully completed the first leg of our summer vacation; a five hour drive to Tifton, GA. We’re staying in “everyone’s second home”, the Tifton Holiday Inn. Right off the bat the hotel exceeded my expectations – free local calls! With my iBook handy, I am ready, willing, and able to milk that deal for all it’s worth. Beth and Mem-May (sorry kids, I’m in no mood for a French lesson now) went down to the pool. Cheryl and Pep-pay are off in search of frozen treats. Me? My waist line has grown a good three inches since dinner; so I’ll stay in, thank you very much. Those of you who have spoken to me lately may know that I was a bit disappointed with the prospect of breaking our eight hour drive to north Georgia into two days (a bit disappointed is the diplomatic way of saying I was throwing a bit of a frustrated fit). However, the drive did turn out quite nice (even if I did want to keep going when we stopped). Everyone was in a good mood and the conversation was very pleasant. No, we didn’t do any singing (if there were I would have tied myself to the roof and ridden outside). I hope this first leg is a sign of things to come.

This is the way I prefer to travel. I’m in my own world, a cool breeze from the air-conditioner blowing in my face, fingers caressing my keyboard in musical world of my own. My eyes are closed. My wife is talking to her mother in the front seat. My father in law and daughter are watching a movie in the second row. Me? I’m sitting in the last row by myself. It has the least leg room of the three by far, but there’s a strange comfort to the place, scrunched up in personal bliss. My feet are crowded up under my seat, my knees at a higher elevation than my lap. My computer is elevated on my knees. My hands are right were they would be if they were in my lap, only the keyboard is in the way. I’ve got an hour to blow, so here we go!

Put yourself in a scene with four other people. Place yourself off to one side, able to observe the others unobtrusively. Now remove all of the audio. Cheryl is looking at her mother, mouthing the occational phrase. When she’s not using it for speech she’s using it to cannibalize her fingers. Cheryl’s mother is driving. Her eyes are obscured by dark sunglasses, but you can sense her attention scanning the setting by the subtle movements of her head presumably following the tracking of her eyes. Joe has taken up his trademark “being a good sport” pose: one hand resting on his stomach supporting the other, which in turn is cradling his chin in it’s palm. Do you ever get the feeling that someone is talking to you?

There is something to be said for portability. I carry a Palm OS handheld nearly everywhere I go. Being able to keep the books I’m reading right there on my handheld, nearly everywhere I go, has been pretty cool. The downside? I have an interesting book with me nearly everywhere I go. Ask yourself this: would you rather work or read that cool book that you can barely put down? That’s a tough one, isn’t it?

Three tickets to the Magic Kingdom: $150.
Two nights in a Magic Kingdom resort: $160.
Bodily fluids lost to sweat in three summer days: 640 fluid oz.
Beverages to replace fluids lost to sweat: $57
Seeing your child play nice with her friend on a Disney Vacation: Priceless.

Sitting in bed, thunder rumbling outside. A television on, the child-like voices of cartoon characters fill the room. A woman sitting in the corner quietly reading through hotel literature. Ear bud headphones pine away like speakers made of glass. Grunge rock softly overwhelms the background noise.

Two of us are waiting for the rain to stop. One of us is waiting for the head ache to stop. Two of us may not have that long to wait.

I haven’t decided if it is better to leave or to be left. Last Friday we were heading home to finish off our trip to New Orleans. I was sitting in our car with Cheryl and Beth, the engine running, everything packed in, mentally preparing to pull out of our parking spot in my sister’s building for one last time. It was a sad moment. Travel can be a bit of an ordeal, but it is a distraction. In that sense, leaving seems to be made easier by the distraction of the task at hand. When you are playing host, and subsequently being left, all you have to look forward to is going back to your normal routine – not nearly so distracting.

He has left, and the disturbance has gone with him. You know a vacation is coming on soon when you find yourself sitting at your desk with your mind on vacation a week early. I’ve been thinking about how I’d like to do the drive and how many hours I’d like to get in the first day. I’ve been thinking about what I’d like to do when I get there and anticipating how much fun I’ll have doing it. Ideally, I would have thought about it when I wasn’t being paid to think of something else. Now that I’m not being paid, I’m tired of thinking about it.

A trip with unprecedented driving distances is coming up soon. We will be driving eleven hours to visit with family in a major metropolitan area.

Cheryl and I disagree on when it is appropriate to swear. Cheryl is firmly in the “never” camp. I on the other hand am a firm believer in the well placed, as needed, off color explicative.

We were all walking through the park. I feel kind of silly because I was looking down, so I should have seen it coming. No sooner did I notice the writing on the floor did I feel a thump on my head. “Holy Newtonian physics Batman, that bird just let go on your head!” At that moment, in the middle of Bush Gardens, I let out a perfectly timed, fully appropriate, “oh shit!” Cheryl showed her disapproval of my suddenly colorful language with a color full gesture of her own, a none to subtle whack on the head. It wasn’t until she looked at her hand that she understood.