It is late. You are lying in bed but sleep will not come. You don’t think you are particularly worried about anything, yet your mind refuses to slow to a pace which will accommodate sleep. You know that you will need to be rested tomorrow, and soon you are dismayed to find that it is tomorrow. You think about all the things you could do to fall asleep. Read something really boring? Check. Get really comfortable? Check. Attempt to clear your mind and relax? Check. Get up and write something really stupid? Check.

At this point I’ve got a couple of choices. I can go for the natural method, not that it’s brought me much success in the past. Plan A: I can deal with the likely frustration of not falling asleep, and the fatigue that will plague me later today; or, I can go with plan B – take some drugs. Come to think of it, my allergies are bugging me a little. Maybe it’s time for a little O.T.C. relief. Raise your hand if you’ve heard of Benadryl. Don’t you feel silly sitting there by yourself with your hand raised? Benadryl is the big gun in my allergy relief arsenal. Once upon a time that distinction was held by Actifed, but no more my friend! Benadryl does for allergies what a pound of C-4 does for insect control – you get a bunch of dead bugs, plus a whole lot more. In this case, what you get is really drowsy. What am I doing here still talking? The time for talk has past; it’s time for action. Wish me luck, I’m going in.

My allergist once said that an itch under the arm (known in scientific circles as the “pit”) is a sign of an allergic reaction. It’s refreshing to know there is an alternative to the “my personal hygiene leaves something to be desired theory; or better yet, the “I’m turning into a primate” theory.

Is there any doubt in your mind that it is late?