Despite evidence to the contrary, I think I’m capable of as much holiday spirit as the next guy. However, I must confess that I’m no longer impressed by holiday noise makers. Dancing Coke cans and singing Christmas trees were cute for about three minutes. Small devices that “beep” out various tunes stopped being cute in 1986. Articles of clothing with built-in noisemakers…
You may not know this, but my wife and I are a pretty damn good team. What makes us a good team? The answer is simple: I do pretty much whatever she asks me to. What makes this arrangement work? My wife knows what not to ask me.
She learned pretty early on not to ask me clean the bathrooms. Using my past performance and the rest of my family as a guide, it’s clear that Cheryl and I simply…
There was really only one reason why I bought an iPod, to listen to music. That’s what I keep telling myself now; but there was a time when I had bigger plans. Rationalization is an extremely important part of my life. Being every bit the lowly hourly wage earner, I needed every reason I could conjure for dropping three big ones on a souped up Walkman. I thought I had a doozie in portable…
If you had just destroyed a perfectly good ankle in a back yard accident, based wholly on your own folly, how would you spend the rest of your afternoon? Many of you would take this golden opportunity and milk it for all of the chore evasion it was worth. Other, lesser mortals would seek medical attention. But I’m willing to wager that I am one of a select few that would go right out (after…
“There are signs all over, you just have to know how to read them.” That was a line in a movie I saw once. I have no idea which movie it was, who was in it, or how long ago I saw it. Come to think of it, I don’t really know if it fits this entry. Let’s find out together, shall we?
If you’ve done any reading on this site in the last twenty-four hours, you know that I…
Find the nearest, most convenient cement slab in your backyard. Place a basketball pole and goal at one end, a table in the middle, and a basketball at the other end. Pick up the basketball and take a shot. When you miss, practice following your shot (with your body, not just with your eyes). The table in the middle serves as an obstacle, much like other people do when you are actually playing…
On the second day of our week’s end, we carefully crafted a day with a special event as its centerpiece. An area mall was to have snow, and we planned to travel twenty miles to see it.
In the grand tradition of Saint Walt (the patron saint of tourism based economies) we Floridians manufacture what Mother Nature does not provide. As is often the case in December, the elements have denied us…
If ESPN sources can be believed, the Urban era at the University of Florida has begun. Where were you when you first heard the news?
I was sitting in court. I got a voice mail message from one of my coworkers on my cell phone while I was sitting in a hearing. Thinking it was an important call, I stepped outside to retrieve the message.
As it turned out, it was an important call.
Now the inevitable…
On this weekend eve I am conflicted. There is the obvious, inherent “goodness” that surrounds the end of the workweek. It doesn’t take a minimum wage job slinging hash at the local fast-frozen-and-fried joint to appreciate a Friday. My problem lies in what hazards lay in my path to the Fair Labor Standard’s promised land. I could put a name to this hazard, but I would…