Family and Friends

The drip heard round the house

Families with school age children live in perpetual fear of a runny nose. One day your child comes home with twin glowing stripes running from nose to lip, the next your house resembles a scene from a bio-medical thriller. People lay around the house listless in their extended wear PJs with the remnants of a box of Kleenex scattered around a nearby trash can like an electron cloud. Last night Adam…
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Family and Friends

Abandonment

Monday marked yet another first day. This time it was Adam’s turn. Adam was at a day care center for the first time Monday morning. If you’re unfamiliar with having children and using day care centers… the first day is often one of the first times you feel like a failure as a parent. He cried when Cheryl dropped him off, he was playing when she picked him up, and he seemed…
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Family and Friends

Foul!

“John! You cut me off!” The set up: Cheryl and I are side by side at the medicine cabinet. I am on the right, Cheryl to the left. We reach for the Costco size bottle of anti-histamine (approximately a 36 month supply) at around the same time. My hand reaches the bottle first, prompting Cheryl’s accusation of foul play. My conclusion: Because we were both standing in front of the…
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Family and Friends

Ode to sitters past

On second thought, I’m a tad tired for poetry. This will have to do. This past week was a bit sad for a couple different reasons. Nothing cataclysmic mind you, just run-of-the-mill melancholy. The most obvious reason was Beth’s forthcoming return to school. Beth had a hard year last year and I hoped (not just for my sake) that this year would be better. But the end of summer vacation…
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BethPoliticsThe Sunshine State

A farewell to freedom

July, we hardly knew thee. In less than one week’s time, Beth will join thousands of school age children in the annual event known as “the first day of school.” Like years past, it will be a time of sorrow in The Kauffman Household (version 2.2.1). As many of you know, the school year starts really freaking early in parts of Florida. If you think we’ve got it bad, our…
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Family and Friends

In the beginning

The line between promise and threat can be razor sharp. It’s best to treat it like anything else with a sharp edge: with care. As his second birthday approaches, Adam has become familiar with the concept of “time out.” Thus far we have used it sparingly, such as when he drops prone to the floor in the throes of a full-bore tantrum. Thankfully those occasions have been somewhat…
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Beth

How do you spell relief?

Our new to nine daughter was conversing with her mother when the topic turned to dinner. (This was last night, by the way.) MOTHER: “Would you like something to eat for dinner Beth?” BETH: “No thanks.” MOTHER: “Are you sure? Not even a little something from the freezer?” BETH: “No, no thanks. If I eat anything else I’ll feel bloated.” FATHER…
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Beth

Family night

I still have the capacity to be surprised. I tend to take a lot for granted, so my continuing capacity to be surprised… is… well… a surprise. This dual layer of surprise struck me last night, at the Dunedin Rec Family Night. I was skeptical when Beth approached her camp leader to ask for an extra treat, for something that she could give to her brother. I didn’t say anything…
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Beth

Follow that?

After yesterday afternoon’s pilot episode of “Beth gets shot” I was expecting to have an epic tale of medical adventure to tell. Alas dear reader, all went well. On the ride over I broke the news… she was starting allergy shots. As expected, it went over like a helium filled cement truck (it might be a little lighter on its feet but it still don’t fly). I nipped the…
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Beth

Squirm like your life depended on it

Have you ever seen a scene in a movie like this? Bad guy number 1 is holding down a good guy from behind, while bad guy number two is slowly approaching with a glowing hot poker (or some other glowing hot instrument at the end of a long handle). If the good guy is not a “tough guy,” the scene usually involves some violent struggling (to get free) as B.G. 2 gets close. A strikingly…
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