Kitchen SinkSports

Bite of the bug

In the beginning there were local sports, and they were occasionally good. Home teams present and past; Bucs, Pats, Bruins, and Bosox held occasional sway with my attention. Home teams past were particularly prominent as there was but one home team present; as were the high scoring affairs: namely football, owing to my impatient nature. Ah, but things change: home team became home teams, and…
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The Sunshine StateTravel

Good news

There is little I find relaxing about a summer vacation in Florida. What about Central Florida theme parks? Here’s a theme for you: dehydration, heat exhaustion, and sun stroke. So here are my first three responses to the proposed weekend trip to Orlando that just passed: 1. “No.” 2. “Please don’t make me go.” 3. “Ah… um… (Sigh)… fine.” Now here’s where the whole thing gets…
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Beth

Follow that?

After yesterday afternoon’s pilot episode of “Beth gets shot” I was expecting to have an epic tale of medical adventure to tell. Alas dear reader, all went well. On the ride over I broke the news… she was starting allergy shots. As expected, it went over like a helium filled cement truck (it might be a little lighter on its feet but it still don’t fly). I nipped the near hysteria in the…
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Beth

Squirm like your life depended on it

Have you ever seen a scene in a movie like this? Bad guy number 1 is holding down a good guy from behind, while bad guy number two is slowly approaching with a glowing hot poker (or some other glowing hot instrument at the end of a long handle). If the good guy is not a “tough guy,” the scene usually involves some violent struggling (to get free) as B.G. 2 gets close. A strikingly similar…
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Computer

One more thing I don’t understand

It has come to my attention that someone has purchased a computer. What is odd about this otherwise mundane purchase? Apparently the computer was purchased for the sole purpose of playing online poker. In my humble opinion “online poker” has no business being in a completely serious statement. Florida Statutes should require that the words “online poker” only appear in a punch line or…
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Family and Friends

Give me a little credit

Cheryl and I are working an angle. Don’t we sound slick? I’ve always wanted to work an angle. Ever since certain inadequacies surfaced in high school math, I’ve had an acute case of protractor envy. (Ego note: kidding aside, I was quite good at high school math.) Actually, this angle we’re working is not nearly as cool as I make it out. (Although there’s no disputing geometry rates…
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Family and Friends

Being functionally blind is WAY underrated

I can’t speak from personal experience, but having seeing problems looks like a major bummer man. Glasses can be a real pain, even when they are professionally fitted. No matter how well adjusted they are, there’s no getting around the fact that you’ve got some precariously balanced scaffolding hanging on your face. The gentle tug at your ears, the pinch at your temples, the pressure at the…
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Kitchen Sink

Copywrong

“Default” is more than just a word, it’s a way of life. Sparse, relatively evenly trimmed greens, browns and sand is the default lawn in Florida. Seventy six degrees is the default temperature on my expensive, programmable thermostat. “Make it shorter” is a default hairstyle. “Whatever you’d like” is the default husband answer. One of the default settings on my “blog” software…
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