I can’t speak from personal experience, but having seeing problems looks like a major bummer man. Glasses can be a real pain, even when they are professionally fitted. No matter how well adjusted they are, there’s no getting around the fact that you’ve got some precariously balanced scaffolding hanging on your face. The gentle tug at your ears, the pinch at your temples, the…
“Default” is more than just a word, it’s a way of life. Sparse, relatively evenly trimmed greens, browns and sand is the default lawn in Florida. Seventy six degrees is the default temperature on my expensive, programmable thermostat. “Make it shorter” is a default hairstyle. “Whatever you’d like” is the default husband answer.
One of the default…
The man was on Larry King this evening and discussed many issues, one of which was the New York Times.
“I have a problem with people revealing state secrets…. With people revealing our game plan to the enemy…. We’re at war.”
All of this comes on the heels of a little “discussion” with my wife earlier this evening. She asked me, “You think it’s…
Factoid number 1: There are more Dunkin Donuts per square mile in New Hampshire than good drivers (based on personal observation).
Factoid number 2: There are more Starbucks per square mile in Florida than drivers under 65 (based on personal observation).
Factoid number 3: The most typical Starbucks customer is an urban, liberal woman under 50 (based on statistical analysis).
Factoid number 4: The…
In honor of the 109th Congress, we’ve been counting down the top ten threats to the institution of marriage in the free world. Next on the list is an insidious threat that resides in a dark place in all of our homes: laundry.
Nothing gets my goat more than someone who puts his or her dirty laundry in the hamper inside out. As if putting away laundry isn’t bad enough, now I’ve got…
I’m so out of whack right now I almost don’t want to discuss it.
I did say ALMOST, didn’t I?
A mid-week holiday almost isn’t worth the trouble.
I did say ALMOST, didn’t I?
It all started on Sunday, just like the calendar says it should. Sunday morning went just as planned; I went to church, came home, took a nap. Then there was Sunday night. In a way it was Sunday…
Have you ever heard the myth that short people tend to be the biggest braggarts? If true, imagine what it would mean if you were the totalitarian ruler of a smallish, extremely poor country; AND, you were only 5′ 3″? I give you Kim Jong-il, leader/ruler/supremely powerful person** of the ironically named “Democratic People’s Republic of Korea.”
First of all, someone…
See if you can appreciate my dilemma. I was getting into the car after an uneventful family outing. I was saddling up in a fashion that left my posterior an attractive target, and my wife gave it a good swat.
“What was that for? Did I do something?” I asked.
“You didn’t do anything John.”
“Is that supposed to be an affirmation or a repudiation?” I…
I don’t have anything particularly insightful to say on the New York Times vs. George Bush debate… you know… the one where the New York Times, through its investigative reporting of government spying programs, is reportedly “giving comfort to our enemies.”
Neither fool, nor sloth, nor slowness of wit will keep me from my appointed rounds. I will expatiate on my…
Take a week and a half away from the office and things will be exactly the same – and eerily out of place all at once. Work for state government and come back from said absence to find that your barely broken-in, one year old PC has been replaced with a new flat panel model… and it may be time to schedule time with your local medical or religious professional.
Either I’m…