I like to think I’m a decent enough guy, but my wife doesn’t call me the sultan of sloth for nothing. My history of drawn out, delayed, and down right ignored projects has reached legendary proportions (if only more people knew about it). So today Cheryl had a baby shower. Like many things in my life, it wasn’t exactly timely, but it’s the thought that counts. Who knew Adam…
Last night I wrote an entry about shaving. It was very late. This morning I woke up and said good morning to my wife and children. The first words out of my wife’s mouth were not “good morning”, but rather, “you are shaving for my shower.”
So I shaved. Some things are just not worth the effort. And seeings how the scrub was the product of sloth, we all know I…
I’ve been going for a new look lately. You see, Cheryl has been away from the office for a good while now, so I thought I would try to make her feel at work. I’m cultivating an “I’m on felony probation” look. It’s rather easy. You don’t shave, you put yourself on the 48 hour hygiene plan, and all systems are go!
What surprises me the most is that she…
Who among you knew that I was a great husband? Lest you doubt me, I have proof. Today I was in the maternity store in the mall buying nursing bras for my wife. If that were not proof enough, listen to this,
I had several intelligent questions for the clerk regarding size and style, and I knew the correct responses regarding nursing pads (not disposable, white, no lace). It was a small shop and…
It was the second day of life for my second child. I was lying down on the “daddy cot” in my wife’s room at the hospital. My newborn child was lying on my chest, peacefully sleeping away the first hours of his life. A visitor was there and remarked, “these are the best days of Adam’s life.”
I have this terrible contrarian streak in me, so naturally my mind leapt…
At 1:38 p.m. a painful, yet blessedly brief chapter in Cheryl’s life came to a close. Adam Kauffman was born. After witnessing the pain, the fatigue, and the fear of childbirth, Adam’s emergence into our world brought tears to my eyes. To see a child being born is to see an epic struggle. In this case it was Cheryl versus the pain and the keeper of the painkillers. Cheryl ultimately…
Midnight is a good time for sleeping. It is a good time for the lights to be out and everyone to be tucked securely into a snug cocoon of warmth, the mind occupying itself only with the business of oblivion.
Of course, that was not to be my lot in life on this night.
Cheryl and I had been home from the hospital for all of twelve hours, and I had been asleep for a fraction of that, when Cheryl…
Another weekend, another hurricane, ho hum. We once again found ourselves an island of electricity in a sea of powerlessness. We once again had some family and friends over to share our power, and generally had a good time. My good time was sponsored by Mikes Hard Limeade, the premium malt beverage with the refreshing taste of lime. Live hard. Drink Mike’s.
There’s nothing like a Bucs…
What is the worst thing that could happen at Starbucks? I found out today. I was looking to make use of my Starbucks card (a much appreciated thank you gift from one of my co-workers), so we stopped by there on our way home from Beth’s haircut. Well unless Chicago is on the way from Seattle to Los Angeles, I guess Starbucks was not exactly on the way, but what the hell. I could use a little…
If you are visiting our home in the near future and someone offers you a chocolate-chocolate chip cookie, just say no. You see there was an incident at our home, an incident filled with disappointment, tragedy and loss. It had little to do with the hurricane and everything to do with my ineptitude in the kitchen.
It began with a party planned at my office. There are several individuals in my…