Having a wife with a longer memory, greater follow-through, and a stronger will, puts a husband at a severe disadvantage.
Consider the issue of outward appearance. My philosophy on hair care can best be described as Laissez-faire. This approach just happens to be in direct conflict to Cheryl’s approach. Then there’s the issue of pride. I have very little and Cheryl has a more generous…
The following entry was rated R – Restricted, due to adult language. It has since been edited.
What would you do if someone insulted your spouse? What would you do if someone openly called him or her hurtful names? Could you simply shrug them off? Could you simply stand by and do nothing?
What if someone insulted your spouse anonymously, but in a public forum? What if you could respond in…
There are times when my son makes the most unusual noises.
When they say that all children are different, I would assume they all at least sound like mammals. You see, there is a time of night when Adam wakes from his newborn slumber. He’s not upset, well not exactly. He sounds like he’s trying to pull a grunt out of his arsenal of noises, but what comes out of his mouth instead sounds…
Do I have faults? Do I do and say stupid things? Does a newborn baby cry in the middle of the night? Do I have funny looking toes?
As Beth and her peer group might say, “Duh?”
One of the most rewarding means of compensating for our faults is pointing them out in others. In that vein, let me tell you about Cheryl, and the great egg debate. As it turns out, Cheryl fancies herself the…
In the south…
I have it on good authority that if John Kerry is elected president, kids will have to go to school on Saturdays and Sundays, and they will only have brussel sprouts and cabbage for lunch in the cafeteria.
George Bush, on the other hand, has the courage to take on the liberal school boards. He has the backbone to take on the vegan lobby. He has the strength of character to stay…
As expected, I’m getting less sleep now than I was before Adam was born. Once again I’ve descended into the realm of the obvious. More importantly, I’m back at work for the first time since Adam was born, and I couldn’t be more alert if someone gave me a swift kick in the head.
Pity the man that comes between me and the sweet nectar of life when I’m operating on less…
Lest you worry that things have settled into a carefree routine here at the Kauffman Household (v. 2.2.1), I have reports of a new and terrifying phenomenon discovered just this morning: projectile poop. I think the name speaks for itself, so I won’t further trouble your imagination with the details. Suffice it to say that it was a horrible mess, one that found your hero facing the business…
The last three weeks have been just about the best. There have been a few hiccups, but spending this time with my wife, my daughter and my newborn son have been precious. Last night I was trying to get my dinner started, Cheryl was asleep, and Adam started to cry. Beth came up to me and said, “Dad, let me hold Adam while you get your dinner, I’ll make him feel better.” I was…
I can’t get credit for nothing man! I went in for a blood test, came home, played chauffer for two hours (making lengthy stops at two different retail “super centers”), took my wife out to lunch, came home, carried in two hundred and fifty dollars worth of miscellaneous do-dads from Target, assembled two floor lamps (twenty minutes each), cleaned up the mess from each box…